Deception: Movie Review (2008)

Sexy time? If only.

Directed by Marcel Langenegger, written by Mark Bomback, 107 minutes, rated R.

The dead-on-arrival sex-thriller “Deception” comes from first-time director Marcel Langenegger, and his inexperience shows.

The movie is a mess and, worse, it manages to be a mostly dull mess at that, with screenwriter Mark Bomback’s script piling on so many heated (and telegraphed) twists that the movie might as well be the cinematic equivalent of a stripped-down version of the Kama Sutra--one without the surprises, the promised peaks, and the necessary thrills to make this tangled effort worth it.

The film stars Ewan McGregor as Jonathan McQuarry, a glum, lonely New York accountant who is brick stupid when it comes to life beyond the calculator and especially to the ways of the bedroom.

In the latter department, things look up for him when he meets Hugh Jackman’s Wyatt Bose, a striking man who has the sort of charisma Jonathan always wanted but couldn’t achieve for himself. When Wyatt greases up to him one evening at work with the offer of sharing an after-hours’ joint, they do so and, predictably, the smoke Wyatt blows Jonathan’s way is as toxic as it comes.

Essentially, Wyatt is a devil in a blue suit, and the dark corridors he leads Jonathan down might initially have the glimmer of glamour--they enjoy tennis, they share drinks at swank clubs, they cruise and carouse--but which quickly falls apart through the damaging vehicle of one ugly cell phone deception.

Without giving too much way, Wyatt swaps out his cell phone for Jonathan’s. And so now, with Jonathan answering Wyatt’s calls, he is ushered into the brave new world of sex clubs, where crafty, hirsute Wyatt apparently thrives, and where Jonathan meets all sorts of women on “The List,” not the least of whom is Charlotte Rampling, of all people, as well as Maggie Q, Natasha Henstridge, and one woman Jonathan is convinced is the love of his life.

That person would be a gorgeous blonde named S (Michelle Williams), just S, who in typical femme fatale form turns out to be a lot of trouble for poor, misguided Jonathan. Watching him fall into her clutches, you want to scream at him, “Deception!” But why bother? At this point, all is lost, save for a kidnapping, a wealth of double-crosses and more than a few sniggers from the audience, who are then treated to one of the most ridiculous, over-explained endings to his theaters this year.

Grade: D+