The Adventures of Mimi: Blu-ray, DVD Review (2008)

“The Adventures of Mimi” Blu-ray

Piercing, but in a good way.

Mariah Carey might have a new CD out in “E=MC2,” but it pales in comparison to her previous album, 2005’s Grammy Award-winning “The Emancipation of Mimi,” which was the focus of her successful 2006 worldwide tour.

Each was responsible for sending the singer back into the orbit she enjoyed during her hey-day in the 1990s.

If this enjoyable concert proves anything, it’s that once Carey finds her groove and connects with her “lambs,” she can be an excellent live performer, particularly when she actually sings melodies instead of huffing and puffing through the chaotic hip-hop jams that never have suited her voice.

Since that’s mostly the case here, “The Adventures of Mimi” soars more often than not.

Grade: B+

Shall We Dance? Blu-ray Review (2008)

“Shall We Dance?” Blu-ray

This remake of Masayauki Suo’s 1996 Japanese romantic comedy of the same name is essentially the same movie charged with an American sensibility.

In this case, that means more drama, more gloss, less grace, less sophistication. It’s a small movie that’s been supersized, but not in a bad way.

Richard Gere is John Clark, a disenfranchised Chicago lawyer unhappy with life’s daily grind and the fact that his wife (Susan Sarandon) is too busy to spend time with him. It’s then that he discovers the joy of dance via Miss Mitzi (Anita Gillette, excellent) and her dance studio.

What he finds there is twofold--the beautiful Paulina (Jennifer Lopez), who’s as cold as a Chicago winter, and his dancing destiny.

A groundswell of schmaltz with no surprises unfolds, but this well-acted, crowdpleasing movie doesn’t fail. It isn’t as rich as the original and the ending slumps into a sleigh of suburban whining, but the dancing has chops, as does the excellent supporting cast.

Read the full, unedited review here.

Rated PG-13. Grade: B

The Golden Compass: DVD, Blu-ray Review (2008)

“The Golden Compass”

Chris Weitz's "The Golden Compass" is undeniably a great-looking movie. A very good Nicole Kidman, for instance, is a golden vision of cinematic perfection, slinking with menace through an otherwise imperfect film stymied by a dense script and a chafe, baited ending that offers more disappointment than satisfaction.

Weitz based his script on the first book in Philip Pullman's "His Dark Materials" trilogy, and he used his $180 million budget to create a world that hovers somewhere between the sterility of science fiction and the richness of fantasy. As a result, the movie can be beautiful and harrowing, but too often, also canned and derivative.

In many ways, "Compass" will remind viewers of 2005's "The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe," a superior film that grabbed audiences from the start with its well-rounded characters and the seamless incorporation of its special effects, which were among that year's best.

Though "Compass" follows "Narnia" in that it created something of a stir within the restless Catholic League, which condemned the movie for what it views as atheist undertones, it otherwise is nowhere on par with "Narnia."

What's missing isn't just a sense of magic to the production and a clear idea of all the evil working to undo young Lyra (Dakota Blue Richards), who is in possession of the golden compass of the title, an alethiometer used to mine the truth in all things asked of it. What's critically missing is soul, momentum and a lasting element of danger, all of which would have helped "Compass" match "Narnia's" operatic tone.

About the compass of the title. Lyra receives it from her uncle, Lord Asriel (Daniel Craig, wasted), who instructs her to keep it hidden from Kidman's Mrs. Coulter, a glam tour-de-force who represents the Magisterium (or the Catholic Church--you decide), and who is all about crushing free will in children.

Helping Lyra fight Coulter and the Magisterium is the warrior polar bear Iorek Byrnison (Ian McKellen)--whose battle with Ragnar (Ian McShane) allows the movie its much-needed slice of action--as well as the Gyptians, scores of witches and even Sam Elliott as a gun-toting cowboy. And there’s more--too much more, really--with the movie eventually collapsing beneath the weight of all its unanswered questions.

Grade: C+

Prom Night, The Orphange: Movie Review (2008)

Two horror movies...and one isn't horrible

Currently, audiences can choose between two horror movies new to the market. One was Spain’s official entry for this year’s Academy Awards. The other is Sony’s unofficial entry for next year’s Razzie Awards, where it almost certainly will be nominated for the revered Golden Raspberry.

Let’s make quick work of the latter movie, Nelson McCormick’s “Prom Night,” which is now bloodying its crown in theaters, and then get on with the horror movie you should see, Juan Antonio Bayona’s “The Orphanage,” otherwise known as “El Orfanato,” which is just out on DVD and Blu-ray disc.

“Prom Night” is a remake of the R-rated, 1980 horror movie of the same name, which starred Jamie Lee Curtis when she was busy making a career out of avoiding butcher knives by any number of madmen. McCormick’s version comes with a more violence-friendly PG-13 rating, which would have been just fine had the movie amped up the tension with good writing and a solid undercurrent of suspense.

It doesn’t. Instead, we get a silly movie in which a hive of young adults are slaughtered and gutted on what should be one of the happiest night of their lives. Who’s wielding the knife? That would be Richard Fenton (Johnathon Schaech), a deranged former high school teacher who once caused cute Donna (Brittany Snow) a groundswell of grief when he murdered her family. Bummer!

Now, on the very night Donna has pulled herself together to shine on prom night, Fenton is on the loose from a maximum security prison and determined to knock her off, as well as all of her friends. So, yes, Fenton is something of a joy kill. And like this rote movie of no surprises--the whole thing is an assembly line of slasher movie cliches--he’s a dull one at that.

There is nothing dull about Bayona’s “The Orphanage,” which didn’t open in the many markets because it features the sort of bump-in-the-night frights some some movie houses fear--subtitles and quality.

Set in a large manor house that once was an orphanage for a host of poisoned tots, this expertly conceived ghost story unfolds with unusual reservoirs of grace and menace. Unlike “Prom Night,” there isn’t a cheap jolt in the movie. Instead, Bayona offers a slow build up of dread through the powerful vehicle of paranormal suggestion. For almost the entire movie, we never really know what’s going on inside the orphanage in question (or what occurred there years ago to make it haunted now), and that’s where the film’s suspense is allowed to mount--in the realm of the unknown.

The film stars Belen Rueda as Laura, who years ago lived in the orphanage before she was adopted. Now, she has returned with her husband, Carlos (Fernando Cayo), and their ailing son, Simon (Roger Princep), to run the place.

Trouble is, before they can do so, Simon starts talking to imaginary friends that turn out to be not so imaginary at all. And when he suddenly disappears after an argument he has with Laura, Laura and Carlos are plunged into two very different nightmares. The first is almost tangible in that it deals with the potential loss of their son, who goes missing for months. The second exists along the gray edges of a parallel state, which Laura is able to tap into. The fact that Carlos can’t causes its share of friction between the two.

What ensues is everything you could hope for from a good ghost story--moody cinematography, mysterious figures appearing, dead children lurking, psychics tapping into a world nobody wants to face, and a complex puzzle of unearthed secrets that eventually lead to one massive plot twist. That the film was produced by Guillermo del Toro (“Pan’s Labyrinth,” “Hellboy II”) only bolsters the production. His influence is clear throughout, but in key scenes, so is Hitchcock’s.

Grades:

“Prom Night”--D

“The Orphanage”--A-

Aliens vs. Predator Unrated 2-Pack: DVD, Blu-ray Review (2008)

"Aliens vs. Predator Unrated 2-Pack”: DVD, Blu-ray

Two reasonably well-crafted, B-horror movie cheapies from Fox.

If you’re up for this sort of thing and willing to roll with each film’s illogical punches, the movies provide a visceral ride, featuring a lively pairing of two infamous screen monsters--the aliens from the “Alien” franchise and the predatory beasts from the “Predator” franchise.

In this way, the set evokes the past, specifically the time in which Universal routinely merged its classic horror franchises. In Fox’s case, they do so without the humor and a lot more gore, but what price pop art?

What unfolds is just what you expect--overblown and ripe, with everyone here given so little to work with, the performances are almost pantomime. But who cares? It’s the monsters that matter, and while at this point they absolutely are eligible for AARP, they nevertheless have retained at least some of their bite.

Unrated. Grade: B-

Juno: DVD, Blu-ray Review (2008)

“Juno” DVD, Blu-ray

Ellen Page is Juno MacGuff, a precocious, ultra-hip 16-year-old high-school student who makes the decision that she's going to put an end to her virginity and have sex with the shy but bright Paulie Bleeker (Michael Cera).

On a sad-looking, dilapidated chair, they have their moment, which initially appears unremarkable until two months and four days later, Juno realizes just how remarkable it really was.

Faced with the news that she’s pregnant, this wise-cracking kid now must decide whether to abort the child or offer it up to parents who might come to love and nurture it, such as wealthy suburbanites Vanessa (Jennifer Grant) and Mark (Jason Bateman)?

From Diablo Cody’s sharp, Academy Award-winning script, Juno eventually finds herself dealing “with things way beyond my maturity level.”

As her hormones rage and her belly balloons (“I’m a planet!”), her emerging vulnerability takes the movie down a notch from the quirky humor it favors during its electric first half. As such, it becomes more human and real--and easily one of last year’s best films.

Read the full, unedited review here.

Rated PG-13. Grade: A-

The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep-Movie, DVD, Blu-ray Review (2008)

“The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep” DVD, Blu-ray

Based on Dick King-Smith’s novel (he wrote “Babe”), a fine reimagining of the Loch Ness monster legend. The location is the coast of Scotland, the time is World War II, and the action involves what happens when young, lonely Angus MacMorrow (Alex Atel) comes upon a sizable egg that hatches into a slippery, pecular creature Angus names Crusoe.

While Crusoe grows…and grows…and grows...these two form a fierce friendship, which naturally is threatened by those who fear all that Angus has come to love.

On high-definition, the cinematography is especially noteworthy (the movie was shot in new Zealand). As Angus’ parents, Emily Watson and Ben Chaplin easily override the cliches. As for the family befuddled dog, well, he needs his own movie.

Rated PG. Grade: B

View the trailer below:

Hidalgo: DVD, Blu-ray Movie Review (2008)

“Hidalgo” DVD, Blu-ray

A bloated oater, long in the tooth.

Set in the 1890s, this epic horse drama is about Frank T. Hopkins (Viggo Mortensen), the real-life Pony Express rider whose real life isn’t explored here. It’s fictionalized, so much so that the truth is stretched so far, it snaps.

Of course, that wouldn’t matter much if the movie had been consistently entertaining, which it isn’t.

Named after Frank’s heroic mustang, “Hidalgo” finds Hopkins taking on a hive of unseemly types led by Omar Sharif’s Sheikh Riyadh and racing them on one massive, 3,000-mile journey across the Saudi Arabian desert.

In spite of the sandstorms, the locusts, the wildcats, the kidnappings and a host of other dangers, "Hidalgo" isn’t content to just offer robust entertainment.

It also wants to strike serious undertones and form elements of a drama. That’s where it tries to have it all--and that’s where it fails to do so.

Rated PG-13. Grade: C

Coyote Ugly: Movie, DVD, Blu-ray Review (2008)

A certain knuckle-dragging charm

Directed by David McNally, written by Gina Wendkos, 101 minutes, rated PG-13.

David McNally’s “Coyote Ugly” is like “Cocktail” on estrogen, “Flashdance” on testosterone, “42nd Street” on crack.

It takes strands of each film’s genetic code and winds them around a film whose story audiences have seen countless of times before: A promising, likable upstart with doe eyes and bright teeth leaves a small town for the brighter shine--and sharper bite--of a big city.

Will she realize her dreams of becoming--in this case--a successful songwriter? Since the film is produced by Jerry Bruckheimer, the man responsible for such subtle hits as, well, “Flashdance,” it’s fair to say that audiences will know going into it that this curvaceous little pot of golden naiveté (Piper Perabo) won’t ever be able to do so until she first participates in something close to a wet T-shirt contest at a popular bar known as Coyote Ugly.

“Coyote Ugly” isn’t a bad film; even in a scene where a bunch of boozy women hoot and holler while setting flame to the top of a whisky-soaked bar, it has a certain knuckle-dragging charm. But it’s comprised of so many parts and pieces of other films, it mirrors those bothersome Olsen twins in that it has no identity of its own.

Worse, the film is like watching a patchwork of movie reruns; sitting there, you know you’ve seen all of this before--and can’t quite believe you’ve parted with money to see it all again.

Amazingly, the filmmakers seem to know this and thus pay considerable attention to dressing up the shopworn script with good cinematography, sharp editing, a smattering of late-‘80’s pop songs and a handful of fair performances.

With the exception of Tyra Banks, whose manic, hyperactive character should have been named Coyote Cleavage instead of Zoe, “Coyote Ugly” features Perabo (“The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle”) as Violet, John Goodman as her doting father, Adam Garcia as her attentive boyfriend, and Maria Bello as the bar’s ballsy owner.

You've never seen such caterwauling.

Grade: C-

The 6th Day: Movie, DVD, Blu-ray Review (2008)

The second man

Directed by Roger Spottiswoode, written by Cormac Wibberley and Marianne Wibberley, 124 minutes, PG-13.

In this futuristic thriller about human cloning, Arnold Schwarzenegger is Adam Gibson, a family man who lives in a world where parents regularly clone their children’s dead pets so nobody ever has to suffer the hardship of finding Fluffy doubling as a hassock in the living room.

But when Gibson returns home one evening to find a clone of himself seated at the dinner table with his family, it becomes clear that this whole cloning business has gotten out of hand. Now under siege by a bunch of clone-happy operatives led by Tony Goldwyn and Robert Duvall, Gibson predictably hits the road running in an effort to stay alive while trying to find out why he was targeted for cloning.

Cormac and Marianne Wibberley’s script distills the ethical and moral issues surrounding human cloning into neat soundbites, some of which are intentionally funny, but most of which, in their amusing effort to be profound, only manage to bear the combined intellectual weight of the Doublemint twins.

Not that anyone will be renting this film to decide whether it’s morally right to resurrect grandpa from the grave. They’ll be expecting action, which “The 6th Day” has, but it’s never as thrilling or as ingeniously conceived as the action scenes in Schwarzenegger’s best films, “The Terminator” and “Terminator 2.”

Indeed, a good part of “The 6th Day” is so caught up in ethics, it forgets it’s supposed to be an action film. Throughout much of it, audiences might be better off closing their eyes and counting the offspring of Dolly the sheep.

Grade: C+

Unbreakable: Movie, DVD, Blu-ray Review (2008)

Unshakable (the similarities)

Written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan, 107 minutes, PG-13.

(Originally published 2000)

The similarities between M. Night Shyamalan’s “Unbreakable” and his critically acclaimed blockbuster “The Sixth Sense” are all too clear--each film features Bruce Willis in the lead, each features a young boy (Spencer Treat Clark) whose life is changed by something otherworldly, each sucks the color out of Philadelphia in an effort to strike a solemn tone of gravity, each builds to a surprise ending.

So, what’s the problem? “Unbreakable” isn’t a step forward for the gifted writer and director, but a regression, a film that finds him casting his lens not into new territory, but within the safer realm of what he knows.

The film follows David Dunn (Willis), a security guard who comes to understand things about himself with the help of Elijah Price (Samuel L. Jackson), a collector of rare comic books who, by all counts, is Dunn’s polar opposite.

Whereas Dunn hasn’t been sick a day in his life, Price suffers from a disease that makes his bones as fragile as glass. It’s a condition that has led him to an intriguing hypotheses: If there are people in the world as fragile as he, then certainly there are people at the opposite end of the spectrum, men and women who--much like the comic book superheroes he covets--possess unbreakable bones and superhuman strength.

On paper, this sounds like rousing stuff, but Shyamalan’s script rarely rises to the level of his enormous skills behind the camera.

The film’s opening moments of a runaway train are the exception--they’re gripping, absolutely terrific--and throughout Shyamalan’s minimalistic approach is to be admired in this overblown era of movies. But movies are more than personal style; if you’re going to lose the flash, you’d better beef up the substance.

Shyamalan doesn’t. As “Unbreakable” pushes forward and it becomes clear where the director is taking us, the level to which audiences must rise to suspend disbelief becomes too high with notions so silly.

Indeed, seeing Bruce Willis tear a door off a car or bench press hundreds of pounds may seem fitting given Willis’ career as an action superhero, but in this context, it’s as unbelievable as the film’s ridiculous “surprise” ending.

Grade: C+

Enchanted: DVD, Blu-ray Review (2008)

“Enchanted” DVD, Blu-ray

Disney’s hit, fish-out-of-water comedy succeeds as well as it does because it understands the affection surrounding the studio’s earliest animated projects, and because it knows there always is room for some good-natured hair pulling, which is what gives this enjoyable movie such a surprising edge.

Amy Adams is Princess Giselle, who is set to marry Prince Edward (James Marsden) and naturally live happily ever after when Susan Sarandon’s Queen Narissa complicates everything by sending Giselle out of their animated world and into the real world.

There, she meets Patrick Dempsey’s Robert, where romantic complications ensue, particularly when Edward comes to fight for her hand.

Marked by Adams irrepressible charm, several complex musical numbers and a clever script, this movie lives up to its name.

Rated PG. Grade: A-

View the video review here. It's the first of three in the set:

I Am Legend: DVD, Blu-ray Review (2008)

“I Am Legend” DVD, Blu-ray

Another day, another movie that features a virus wiping out humanity.

In this case, the exception is Will Smith’s resourceful Robert Neville. Save for his faithful dog, Neville is alone in this science-fiction/horror potboiler--or so he thinks before the undead start charging after him at night.

Based on Richard Matheson’s 1954 novel--which has been filmed twice before, first with Vincent Price in 1964’s “The Last Man Standing” and then in 1971 with Charlton Heston in “The Omega Man”--the movie is strong until its final third, when it lapses into a funk of cliches and sentiment that undermine much of the goodwill that came before it.

Still, since what comes before it is involving--the special effects are especially good --the movie is recommended, with reservations.

Rated PG-13. Grade: B-

View the video review below. It's the second review in a series of three reviews:

The Rookie: Blu-ray Review (2008)

“The Rookie” Blu-ray

A movie about an old jock made for old jocks, but in its effort to glorify their dreams, the film shrewdly doesn’t make any of it look easy.

Dennis Quaid is Jim Morris, the Texas science teacher and high-school baseball coach whose lifelong dream of pitching in the major leagues was realized in real life.

Rachel Griffiths is Jim’s wife, who offers support and quiet advice.

"The Rookie" understands our love of baseball and respects it, so much so that it mines real feeling for the game, its fans and players in spite of the script’s sentimental overtones, which it overcomes.

One of Quaid’s best roles.

Rated G. Grade: B+.

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen: Movie, DVD, Blu-ray Review (2003)

Extraordinary? Not so much

Directed by Stephen Norrington, written by James Dale Robinson, 110 minutes, rated PG-13.

(Originally published 2003)

The adventure film, “The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen,” an oxymoron if there ever was one, is a weapon of mass destruction, a movie rigged with so much TNT, the damned thing keeps blowing itself up.

Throughout, whole cities explode, submarines explode, mountainsides explode and people explode, and yet the movie, without the assistance of an explosive script, quickly counts itself among the destruction.

Loosely based on Alan Moore’s darkly imagined comic books, "LXG"--as the ghetto-fabulous folks at Twentieth Century Fox are marketing it, presumably to catch the eye of the attention-deprived hip-hop set--has a terrific premise and squanders it.

It takes a handful of the Victorian era's more infamous heroes and villains, and asks them to stop an evil force called the Fantom from conquering the world.

In the books, that idea moved like a snake to a rat. Fueled with Moore's ferocious wit and the clever, sudden jags he hooked through the corners of his story, there was no stopping the brutal, high-minded fun.

Director Stephen Norrington's film, on the other hand, jacks the books' energy with such an overbearing 21st-century sensibility, it quickly dumbs down the proceedings with an overkill of action clichés.

The result? A summer blockbuster as overstuffed as a WWE locker room, but with none of the fun and all of the odor.

Set in 1899, “LXG” imagines a world on the brink of war, with Britain and Germany gearing up for a major battle after the mysterious Fantom lays waste to each with his seemingly endless supply of bombs. With both countries blaming the other, the head of British intelligence--not coincidentally named M (Richard Roxburgh)--is ordered by the Queen to get to the bottom of things.

M does so by reaching out to Sean Connery's Allan Quatermain, the roguish adventurer from H. Rider Haggard's "King Solomon's Mines," who reluctantly agrees to join the fight by forming a literary league of superheroes.

The team he gathers is impressive: Oscar Wilde's Dorian Gray (Stuart Townsend), Mark Twain's Tom Sawyer (Shane West), H.G. Well's the Invisible Man (Tony Curran), Jules Verne's Captain Nemo (Naseeruddin Shah), Robert Lewis Stevenson's Dr. Jekyll-Mr. Hyde (Jason Flemyng), and Bram Stoker's Mina Harker (Peta Wilson).

With special effects that are just a step above what you see on the Sci Fi channel and a script by James Dale Robinson that favors flash and fire over nuance and logic, "The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen" is actually rather illiterate, a disappointment that has its moments, particularly with the charismatic Connery, but which is rarely as extraordinary as its title suggests.

Grade: C-

The Italian Job: Movie, DVD, HD DVD, Blu-ray Review (2003)

Mini Coopers--and maximum action

Directed by F. Gary Gray, written by Donna Powers and Wayne Powers, 110 minutes, rated PG-13.

(Originally published 2003)

In "The Italian Job," a smart, blistering remake of Peter Collinson's 1969 film of the same name, Mark Wahlberg, Charlize Theron and Edward Norton star in a film whose $35 million gold heist isn’t just the prize but the problem.

At least for the characters.

The film, which director F. Gary Gray based on a screenplay by Donna Powers and Wayne Powers, lacks the original’s inspired casting (Noel Coward and Benny Hill as thieves), but it offers greatly improved stuntwork and gives a fun update to the three Mini Coopers so crucial to the plot and action.

Energetic and lean, beautifully shot and well-acted, Gray’s film is a caper whose hip style is generated almost entirely from within. That infectious style is given a lift from the looseness of its cast, which helps to create a breezy, ultra-cool mood that never feels manufactured, unlike in this year's other caper, the mildly disappointing "Confidence."

Befitting the title, the film opens in Venice with a daring heist that leads to a wild boat chase through the city's clogged canals. It's a rousing opening, one that seamlessly introduces all the major players and their individual strengths amid the action.

There's Charlie (Wahlberg), the architect behind the heists; John (Donald Sutherland), the veteran safe-cracker; Steve (Norton), whose personal connections prove vital; and Handsome Rob (Jason Statham), who knows how to handle women as well as he knows how to handle the wheel of a car or a boat.

Also on board are Lyle (Seth Green), a computer geek who claims he’s the mastermind behind Napster, and Left Ear (Mos Def), whose partial deafness proves he knows a few things about blowing things up.

Together, they’re a formidable team. But when one member of the group gets greedy and turns on the others, brazenly stealing the $35 million in gold they hauled out of Venice and leaving one man dead, the remaining members strengthen their bond and set out to destroy the dirty thief and vindicate their friend’s death.

They do so by enlisting the help of Stella (Theron), a gifted safe-cracker who has personal reasons for seeing this vendetta through: the man who was murdered was her father.

Bolstered by a brisk pace and its solid performances--Theron finally realizes her potential here, but then so does the Mini Cooper, which sees its star shine brighter--“The Italian Job” proves that for a heist movie to get the job done right, audiences will forgive minor lapses in logic in favor of style, chemistry and inventive action. F. Gary Gray comes through with just that--and then he surpasses expectations by coming through with more.

Grade: B+

Dogma: Blu-ray DVD Review (2008)

"Dogma": Blu-ray

Doggerel in hi-def.

Kevin Smith begins his foray into suburban absurdity with a disclaimer that asks audiences--and film critics--not to be offended by his film, or to take it seriously.

He’s just having fun, after all, and doesn’t mean to anger anyone--certainly not Catholics, whose religion he crucifies and drags through the mud for 125 minutes. All in the name of a good time, of course.

Maybe it was the devil that made Smith lose his nerve and add that disclaimer. But if he did it because of pressure from angry Catholic groups who denounced “Dogma” as spurious trash worthy of excommunication upon the film's 1999 release, then he’s a fool who undermined his film and his reputation as a director who once had something to say.

Not that he has anything of interest to say here. One could pray all day for “Dogma,” spritz its script with Holy Water and genuflect to the high heavens before viewing it, and still it would be doggerel, a crude, vacuous, unfunny bit of misogyny that wants audiences to gasp at its naughty ideas, all of which lack substance and bite.

It’s true--if you don’t count how bad “Dogma” is, nothing about it shocks. It is, in fact, a rather half-hearted attempt to reach out and pull Catholicism’s pigtails, which could have been interesting had Smith fully understood and explored the hypocrisies he sensed within Catholicism and then skewered them with wit.

He doesn’t. His film--which is about two fallen angels (Matt Damon and Ben Affleck) who have found a loophole to get back into heaven--makes the dull mistake of mining its humor from the gutter before wrapping it around reams of mind-numbing theology. That’s one of the reasons the film fails--Smith’s dialogue, so sharp in his previous films, is too dense to pack a punch.

In the end, “Dogma” can best be defined by one of its scenes. When a giant walking pile of feces bubbles up from a toilet and starts killing people in a bar, three things become clear: the film’s creative think tank is woefully low, the director is desperate for a laugh, and he will do anything to get that laugh. At my 1999 screening, audiences were silent throughout that scene--and throughout much of the movie--suggesting that Smith should have flushed his script and started anew.

Rated R. Grade: D

Gattaca: Blu-ray DVD Review (2008)

"Gattaca" Blu-ray

Imagine a world where perfection is genetically possible. Okay, that's easy to imagine. But now imagine this: Life begins not in the womb, but in the test tube, where genetic elements are clinically tampered with to weed out any number of deformities.

In the cold, futurific world explored in “Gattaca,” those deformities might include, say, skin color, sexuality, obesity, what have you, with the end result being a child whose possibilities are so endless, corporate doors eventually will swing wide to accept this “valid” individual into their ranks.

But what if you were created from a more natural form of coupling and still wanted the perks of the genetically perfect? Such is the case with Vincent (Ethan Hawke), an “in-valid” who dreams of becoming a crew member on an expedition to Titan, Saturn's fourteenth moon.

To do so, he first must land a job at Gattaca, a space station that routinely checks the “validity” of their employees by taking blood and urine samples. Does Vincent make it inside? Of course--just in time to meet the woman of his dreams (Uma Thurman) and to be rooted out for a murder he didn't commit.

This compelling variation of “Brave New World” is stylish and provocative, a drama that looks deep into the soulless perfection of the petri dish, where it sounds a warning bell by showing us exactly where our own world might be headed.

Rated PG-13. Grade: B+

No Country for Old Men: DVD, Blu-ray Review (2008)

"No Country for Old Men"

The Academy Award-winning, modern-day Western "No Country for Old Men" hails from Ethan and Joel Coen, who arm themselves with Cormac McCarthy's fantastic 2005 book of the same name and deliver one of 2007's best films in the process.

Working from their own script, the Coens craft a violent, engrossing movie that never telegraphs or condescends; it keeps its twists and its surprises close to its bleeding heart, which is significant because in this violent movie, that heart often is hemorrhaging.

Set in 1980, the film stars Josh Brolin as Llewelyn Moss, a Vietnam veteran hunting one day along the Texas-Mexico border when he comes upon a grisly mass murder in the desert. There, he also comes upon a stash of drugs and, later, $2 million in cash sandwiched within a black case.

It's when Moss takes the money that everything goes sour for him.

After all, working against him is the formidable psychopath Anton Chigurh (Javier Barded in an Academy Award-winning performance), a man who sports a Buster Brown blowout and who for reasons best left for the screen, decides that Moss is going to pay for stealing that money. He's going to track Moss down, he's going to get that money for himself, and God help anyone who gets in his way.

One person who does is Sheriff Ed Tom Bell (Tommy Lee Jones), who completes the film's deadly triangle by going after Moss and Chigurh. This superb movie is about the sly weaving of skill and chance that unfolds between them all, with the characters crisscrossing in and out of each other's reach with such mounting heat, they create a knot onscreen that tightens in your gut.

With its accomplished performances, direction, writing and cinematography, "No Country for Old Men" ultimately is a movie haunted by what the West was and what the West has become. At its core, the movie knows they aren't so different--and that's what troubles it.

Grade: A

Read the full unedited review here.

View the trailer below:

Dan in Real Life: DVD, Blu-ray disc review (2008)

"Dan in Real Life" DVD, Blu-ray

Real life? Nah--but the emotions are real, and that's one reason the movie succeeds.

Steve Carell is Dan Burns, a newspaper columnist on the cusp of syndication who is adrift in the wake of his wife's death.

Complicating his life are his three daughters, all a handful of teens and tweens growing up faster than Dan would like, and also Marie (Juliette Binoche), the woman Dan falls in love with after they meet by chance at a bookstore. Trouble is, as Dan soon finds out, Marie is the new girlfriend of his philandering brother, Mitch (Dane Cook), who claims he never has found anyone as right for him as Marie.

And there you have it. Since Dan is the kind of guy who can't help wearing his feelings on his face even though he wants his brother to be happy, the plot complications are revealed and, well, you can see where this is going, can't you?

The film takes this situation and these characters, and places them in the hell of a large family retreat in Rhode Island. There, Dan's mother (Dianne Wiest), father (John Mahoney), siblings and their families converge for the sort of choreographed, chaotic time families tend to enjoy in the movies.

And yet "Dan in Real Life" rises above expectations. A good reason for that is the chemistry Carell shares with Binoche, which is the movie at its best. Though their pairing seems unlikely on paper, what matters is how well they make it work onscreen.

Each comes to their roles with the sense that in middle-age, life has taken away plenty from them, but might be ready to offer plenty back. It's how they get there--or, better put, whether they dare to get there--that makes for a satisfying movie that resonates through its otherwise formulaic script.

Rated PG-13. Grade: B

Read the unedited review here.

View the trailer below: